So much has taken place these last few weeks, saying goodbye, packing up our belongings, flying to Spain and moving our things from one continent to another. The Lord has been so faithful in it all. I’m grateful mostly not for the circumstances working out as much as for the peace He has given. I knew saying goodbye would be tough, but there was a peace and joy in it I cannot explain. Hearing about several expenses we did not expect was also ok, knowing He knew all along and He is in control of all of that. Flying here to meet Tyler alone with the kids, my bags were overweight, I didn’t have a doctor’s note, or notarized permission from Tyler. But knowing there was nothing I could do I had no choice but to trust He would take care of it and He did.
Several years ago I know I would have been a nervous wreck during all of this. Actually normally I would, it’s amazing the grace He gives when we are in a place with no choice but to trust.
Once we arrived it was so sweet to have all of us together, and we were finally moved here!! I feel as though we have waited and planned forever!
But then the second day being here it hit me. This is it! My flesh and my heart started to fail me. A couple of gloomy days and poor night’s sleep and I was not doing well.
The challenges of cooking in a new place, the language slightly different, the culture shock about to hit, the kids not quite themselves. Fighting a cold, the time to think and be left alone in my thoughts after months of being surrounded and distracted by people. The fear of loneliness, and missing friends and family, the general letdown.
Judson mentioned his cousins should be sitting at the table with us along with their dog by his side, at that point I couldn’t hold back the tears any longer. I knew this was coming, I should have been ready for it. The Lord brought me back to one of my favorite verses last night
Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth. (Psalms 46:10)
I really haven’t had to be still in a long long time. Some days are too hard to be still when we allow our thoughts to consume us. But we cannot sense His presence unless we are still. The point is not to sit and think about all the things that are wrong, or could go wrong, but to dwell on Him.
But the verse doesn’t stop there. Why do we need his presence? So He will be exalted in the earth. Our whole reason for doing all of this is so that He will be exalted. What a privilege! Yet I can never exalt Him if I am not truly aware of His presence.