Who Knew?

I had no idea on the morning of my wedding seven years later I would be living on the tip of the African continent, reading a basket full of board books and being fed plastic food for breakfast! I have to admit, I sure have it made.

I am so overwhelmed by the goodness of God when I think about these past seven years with my husband and see all that the Lord has brought us through. Just the fact that my husband can still say with a straight face he thinks I’m still just as beautiful and loves me even more is a miracle. Sometimes when I stop looking at the random mickey in the hallway and trucks/princess clothes all over my house. I can see these two little miracles with all of the noise and craziness they bring into our marriage. It has only been enriched by their presence. I have come to see sides of the man I love, sides I never would have without the stress/help of two little gifts from God.

So today I want to thank the Lord for the Husband He has given me, the life He has allowed me to live with the man of my dreams. It’s never as romantic as we always imagine, but there sure is depth. Depth of love that only comes from the heart of God. Thank you Lord for allowing me to see a small picture of the Love you have for this world. Through the love of my husband.

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

Just the four if us this year. It really made me sad to think about missing another Christmas with family and friends. To the point I thought seriously about skipping it altogether. But the Lord had other plans and so did my family. It was a rough start to the season. But He really broke through and decided to really bless us this year with the sweetest Christmas I have ever experienced. He is so good.
From the meal that came together perfectly, to two of the best behaved kids in the world, to lots of hugs and kisses and snuggles from my family. It was the sweetest couple of days we have had together.
Norah was so into it this year,she was a joy to have helping me in the kitchen. Judson was in heaven with all the extra sweets. Mostly Tyler was the one who made Christmas so special for all of us. I can’t thank him enough for his strength. I know I am blessed with a husband and father to my children who takes the time to make us feel secure and loved in this place that is slowly becoming home. He really helped to pull things together and make it so special for all of us.

But this year Christmas and what we celebrate hit me in a whole new way. The idea that the God of the universe would choose to send his Son in such a humble manner, just baffles me. What incredible love for His creation. The love I have for my children doesn’t even compare to his love for his son or his children. We are so blessed. Of course this is the most wonderful time of the year. We are celebrating our
Savior. We all know these things, but this year it hit home.

A Mother’s Worry

This poem is a sweet picture of the sacrifice our God made for us, seen through the eyes of a mother. I thought it was perfect for Christmas. After all this is what Christmas is all about. Christ was born so he could carry our sin to the cross. It truly is humbling to think about.

Kate’s Poetry

A Mother’s Sacrifice Oh my prescious Jesus, You were once my little one And I a young new mother In love with her first born son But now the locks of chestnut hair I brushed from your sweet face Are tangled in a crown of thorns Blood mats them into place The cheeks I kissed so tenderly When they were plump and round Now brutally smashed and swollen so, Your likeness cannot be found Those chubby little toddler hands Once held my finger tightly But now they’re pierced, run through for me A vision so unsightly Those arms you wrapped around my neck Now stretch from beam to beam And the blood we shared within the womb From you now freely streams My precious little rowdy boy, Now I call you Lord The sides I once tickled and hugged Now pierced by Satan’s sword I used to rub your back at night So lightly, till you fell asleep But where my fingers traced your skin Are lashes brutally deep I watched those legs that carried you home After days of boyish games Waver beneath the weight of the cross As they bore the full burden of shame I once listened to your heart at night When you nestled on my breast It beat for God, for the world, for me, Now broken within in your chest Your voice once called me “Mommy” And sang praises to our King Now it begs forgiveness for my sins And offers life everlasting

Sunday morning

Here lately we’ve been traveling without a car so i’m going to try to break it down and share a little day in our life with you.

Wake up Sunday and have the typical mad rush, breakfast, pack bag, get kids fed and dressed. And finally out the door. We take a taxi to the border, walk across and wait. Some sundays this process can take over an hour and some 20 minutes. Usually we run into someone who knows my husband and they always smile and want to talk. We then get across and have to take another taxi to these stairs that make you want to just cry looking at them. we get all of our stuff, carry children, stroller and belongings up about 50 steps then walk through a… lets just say it’s a back alley waste land. We then arrive at the taxi station and have to find a taxi and pay for 4 spots. But we then have to wait for two more people to fill the last two spots. My husband usually has to fight with the driver just to pay the normal price. Even though everyone knows how much it costs Somehow they always come up with some reason why we owe more. So after intense arguing they hug and we get in the car and everyone is happy. Strange? Yes, but they always love to hear my husband argue in Arabic. it’s part of their culture so they are usually surprised and end up loving him.

We arrive in the city after an hour and a half of driving. and either walk or pay for two small taxis (because only three people can ride at a time) to get to the place we are meeting. So that’s a total of 5 taxi’s one way. On our way home we can cut it down to 2 sometimes. sounds ridiculous? because it is. Lord willing we’ll have our car one day and all of this is much much easier.

I have to say our kids are normally very easy going and happy during this trip. I really think the Lord has helped us in that area. They are hardly ever an issue. Usually entertained by strangers, because they just adore children. (more than any culture i have ever been around) Or maybe by the cats all hanging out at the border or in any area really. But the people here are so animated in their communication with each other. There is always some entertainment. Norah knows the basics like don’t touch the walls etc… it’s all dirty but i love seeing how easy going they can be when they are around other cultures, learning the cultural norms etc… It’s just a pleasure to have children here. They always open the door to conversation and friendship.

On our way home they usually fall asleep and I end up just thinking and thanking the Lord for allowing us to do this. There is nothing like a ride through the mountains in one of the most beautiful places in the world with two sleeping children and holding my husbands hand, even the nostalgia of riding in an old car, the kind I grew up riding in. All of this reminds me of the fact of how good God is. I don’t deserve to be here, and sometimes I wish I could just do things normally. But where is the fun in that? My kids are blessed as well to live such a life.

Happy Birthday Tyler

The Lord has blessed me with the most amazing husband a girl could ever ask for. Thing is I didn’t even imagine this good. I thank the Lord for where he has put us, and I know I would never be here if it weren’t for my husband, in many ways. He has done all of the work to get us here. He continues to work hard at the language, residency and has been an amazing Father and Husband while living here and getting to know this place. I have to admit I have not been the easiest wife, yet somehow he still loves me.
I pray Judson becomes a dad and husband just like him and Norah is blessed with a husband like her daddy.
He has been the backbone of our family. I wouldn’t change a thing about him. I don’t deserve him, but I am so grateful for him. Happy birthday Tyler, I love you!

What’s your worth?

Lately it’s been a struggle to get past the idea that I am not good enough. I know the truth but there are some weeks when you feel it deep in your soul. The weight of your sin, the disappointment in circumstances, the feeling of just not being good enough. Today I was reading, but my heart has been so broken I just had to stop in the middle and beg God to speak to me. The next chapter I came across these verses.
And hereby we know that we are of the truth, and shall assure our hearts before him. For if our heart condemn us, God is greater than our heart, and knoweth all things. (1 John 3:19, 20 KJV)
Only God knew how much I needed that reminder. My worth is found in him. Not my works, not what people think about me, or how they treat me. Not how good I am or how good or bad I look. It’s only in him. It’s not in my mommy skills, or my children, not in a clean house. Man it feels good to say that!!!
It’s not in any of my failure’s (though i have many) or accomplishments(not so many of those).
No matter what my heart tells me, I need to listen to the One who knows the truth.
I really needed that love note from my Father in heaven today.

True love

There is this man in my life when I first met him, he became my best friend. My friends told me we should get married, but it was one of those relationships I thought “ugh, dating will ruin this”. But God had other plans.

As time goes by and our family has grown, our way of telling each other we love each other isn’t as “romantic” to maybe a 20 year old, but really it’s so much better. It’s that cup of coffee greeting me in the morning. That stinky diaper changed, the help cleaning up after we’ve both had a long day and dishes are the last thing we want to look at. The millions of little things he does to show his love to us and our family.
But my favorite is when I see him with our children. There is nothing sweeter to me and nothing more attractive.

When I went away to be with some people a couple months ago. He encouraged me to go and kept the kids so I could. I remember hearing from quite a few people that their husbands all laughed and said they would “never do that.” I can’t help but be grateful for the Love that my husband has for me without limits as to what he would do to show me.
He’s also put up with lots of emotional baggage here lately and has been so understanding, and trying to help me through some hard times.
I love him and with every day I am amazed yet again by his love for me. Such a sweet picture to me of christ’s love for us. Thank you Tyler.  I love you.